Okay, so…my life isn’t very slow. As a matter of fact, it’s kinda busy and fast. Let’s be real: I’ve had plenty of chunks of time where I could have written a post for this blog in the past month, but I always ended up using that time to catch up on my Hulu queue, or to actually take the trash out and do the dishes, or to join a gym and work out (could it be?!). But now it’s snowing, which means I am not setting one foot outside of my door for the rest of the night, and that leaves me with zero excuses not to just sit mah butt down and write a little posty post.
I am not the kind of person who deals well with taking on all of the responsibilities, however big or small, that are required when transitioning to adulthood. I am instead the kind of person who deals with it by putting everything off and making everything harder for myself. Please click on the image below to go to a blog I posted on my Facebook earlier this week…it describes exactly how I feel. The girl who writes the blog is super funny and very talented and describing the mind of an overwhelmed twenty-something like myself.
Anyway, because all of those responsibilities exist, I remain in a constant state of frazzledness, especially when I am sitting in my cubicle from 8 (okay, 8:30) to 5 and thinking about how many things I have to do after the work. So instead of letting life unfold day by day, I’ve been stressing about not getting every load of laundry done or forgetting the butter at the grocery store. This, of course, leaves me hardly any time to actually just chill out and write in a blog or read a book. But in the past month, I think I’ve finally started coming into my own. That’s not to say I don’t still have a minor freak out at least once a week (or once a day), but…I feel myself adjusting. It’s been a slow process (it only took eleven months!), but I think I’m finally getting to the point where I can accept that I am not going to be able to get everything done by my own self-appointed deadline, and that is okay. It really is.
Something that brought me back to the simpler things in life was one my of my tutor sessions last week. I volunteer for a program that is a part of PPL (Project for Pride in Living), tutoring two girls once a week, and then once a month getting together with a larger group of tutors and tutees (hehe) to do a fun event (bowling, rock climbing, etc). Anyway, on Monday I was tutoring one of my little girls (seven years old), and she decided that for our fun time after the reading and homework part was over, she wanted to play with glitter. I tried to steer her in a different direction (“How about this really fun puzzle of a monkey?!”), but she remained insistent. So I grudgingly grabbed some glue, some colorful foam pieces, and the bag of silver glitter (whoever bought that and then put it in plain sight of the kids was obviously not thinking ahead), spread a couple of paper towels to catch any excess glitter, and let her go to town.
It was immediately a mess. A sparkly, completely unavoidable mess. Glitter in her hair, on her jacket, on my face, on the floor, on the table. Luckily, some was actually sticking to
the glue on the foam pieces as well, which was our original objective. She informed me I had to put glitter on something too, so I grabbed a little yellow piece in the shape of a dragonfly and sprinkled some glitter on. She helped by telling me it wasn’t enough and dumping more on for me. We ended up laughing as glitter flew everywhere and doing a wiggly dance to shake as much glitter as possible off of our clothes. As I wiggled around shaking my knees and and arms and watching my little tutor girl do the same, I was overcome with a sense of calm. I brought her and her art project home, successfully covering the inside of my car with its own layer of glitter, and since that day, whenever I get stressed out, I remind myself of how I felt in that moment. Everything I’ll be okay. I mean…why stress when you can just play with glitter instead?